I absolutely love the way this is written. Nothing stands out to me as inherently wrong. You could add a little more detail, and I feel like we learn a lot about Izima, but not much about Em.
"Sun Through the Rain" is this week's featured visual art on vtdigger.org, up now in their Life & Culture section. Everybody can check it out now, here! vtdigger.org/life-culture
"Watching" is this week's featured poem on vtdigger.org, up now in their Life & Culture section. Everybody can check it out now, here! vtdigger.org/life-culture
What an absolute UNIT of a cookie! I'm digging this interpretation of cookies and milk, I've never seen a drop cookie like this before! The heart adds the perfect little touch.
Oh my gosh, I didn't even realize this was in response to the Five challenge at first. This vocabulary fits in flawlessly, not forced at all! This is exactly how I remember my days at summer camp, too: filled with purpose, though I didn't realize it at the time.
I love the whimsy of this piece ("or who had crashed into a log that day")! But also, I get the impression you know what you're talking about, when it comes to boats. That knowledgeability (or your gift of convincing the reader you're knowledgeable, in any case) really shines through.
WOW!!! Elise, as someone who has read so many of your poems over the last year, this took me back in the best way possible. The vocabulary in this piece is lovely and fits perfectly with what you are describing. Writing is particularly ritualistic and religious, and how you speak about it is elegant and honest. The last line is truly the most powerful aspect, and I can appreciate it as someone who also isolates during the winter months. I am so proud of how far you have come, as should you!
I absolutely love the way this is written. Nothing stands out to me as inherently wrong. You could add a little more detail, and I feel like we learn a lot about Izima, but not much about Em.
"Sun Through the Rain" is this week's featured visual art on vtdigger.org, up now in their Life & Culture section. Everybody can check it out now, here! vtdigger.org/life-culture
"Watching" is this week's featured poem on vtdigger.org, up now in their Life & Culture section. Everybody can check it out now, here! vtdigger.org/life-culture
What an absolute UNIT of a cookie! I'm digging this interpretation of cookies and milk, I've never seen a drop cookie like this before! The heart adds the perfect little touch.
Oh my gosh, I didn't even realize this was in response to the Five challenge at first. This vocabulary fits in flawlessly, not forced at all! This is exactly how I remember my days at summer camp, too: filled with purpose, though I didn't realize it at the time.
I love the whimsy of this piece ("or who had crashed into a log that day")! But also, I get the impression you know what you're talking about, when it comes to boats. That knowledgeability (or your gift of convincing the reader you're knowledgeable, in any case) really shines through.
Good luck with your sophomore year! :)
WOW!!! Elise, as someone who has read so many of your poems over the last year, this took me back in the best way possible. The vocabulary in this piece is lovely and fits perfectly with what you are describing. Writing is particularly ritualistic and religious, and how you speak about it is elegant and honest. The last line is truly the most powerful aspect, and I can appreciate it as someone who also isolates during the winter months. I am so proud of how far you have come, as should you!
I love this!! It reminds me so much of the Giving Tree.
I would recommend where the road leads us by Robin Ruel, it was so funny, sweet, genuine and overall a great read!