The Inevitable

The inevitable 
Time 
Ticking by 
It seems to speed up 
The older I get 
The closer I get 
To passing through 
The bewildering 
Magnificent archway 
Of eighteen. 
I don’t want to 
I’ll get more prepared 
And the dread will lessen 
Then I’ll realize 
Three years away 
Two years away 
A year and a half away 
Two more summers 
One more Halloween 
One more Christmas season 
Then 
The inevitable 
I owe it to my family 
To be a normal person 
To grow up 
I can’t be a child 
Forever 
They console me 
You’ll get into college 
You’ll figure it out 
You’ll make friends 
You’ll remember 
To eat 
Shower 
And sleep 
You’ll learn to live
Among strangers
You’ll conquer your fears
But that’s not
The point
The point is

I have never
Spent
More than a night
Without someone taking care of me
I’ve had sleepovers
I’ve even stayed for weeks
At my grandparent’s house
But they took care of me
And now I’ll be
All
Alone
The inevitable
The point is
There’s nothing
To anticipate
How can I
When I have
No
Idea
What it will be like
The inevitable
The point is
I’m not an adult
I don’t feel like a teen
I’m a child
I find easter eggs
With a ten and an
Eleven year old
I go trick-or-treating
I love bubbles
And sugar
And imaginary play
I feel too ancient
To be me
Eighteen
Only
A Halloween away.