Biggest Hardship


Something that I have struggled to cope with these past couple of years is the suicide of a loved one. Having to deal with the fact that they were gone and that I would never see them again because of the choice that they made, was the worst things that I have ever been through. The first year after they were gone was spent worrying about why they did it. I used up so much time beating myself up about how I could’ve acted differently. I never stopped trying to convince myself that changing one small thing would result in them still being here. I was in so much pain and there were some days where I couldn’t seem to stop thinking about them or get myself to stop crying. Somewhere along the way though, it got easier. I was able to think about them and laugh, instead of breaking down. There are still days where it hits me harder than others, and I don’t think I will ever be completely healed from this, but I can safely say that life has gotten better. The biggest lesson that I have learned from this whole experience is that no matter what happens to me and how bad it is, I can always rebound from it. I am stronger than I know and there is no problem too big or too bad, because I will always be able to guide myself through it.
 

Noell.k21

VT

20 years old

More by Noell.k21

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    Friends are delight.

    Someone to confide in and feel safe with.

    They will listen to all your worries

    And love you though you are not perfect.

    They will always help you see the light
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    I turn my head to the sky,

    While closing my eyes.

    I drink in the moon’s soft glow

    and let it dance across my face.

    Thousands of stars watched me

    With my feet rooted in place.
  • My Best Friend


        He was always my favorite, out of all of them - It was barely a competition. He knew it too. Ever since the day that I met him, the day that he was born, we could never be separated.