lunch table thoughts.

i sit at the lunch table with my few friends,

i have so many thoughts at this time,

i am silent.

i need new friends.

i think.

new friends that don't treat me like i'm dirt.

i look around at all the faces.

bright smiles and freckles.

but i never can make new friends

i think again.

high-school will be different.

i say to no one in particular.

i will make it different,

i'll have new friends,

at a new lunch table.

why do you hurt me?

i think.

after all the years we've had,

why do you decide to hurt me?

i cock my head to the side.

but why don't i leave?

i think.

why don't i leave these horrible friendships and move on?

i can't.

i look away from all the gleaming faces.

focus on me,

focus on being me,

focus on caring for me.

don't hurt me.

care for me.

don't beat yourself up over these guys.

i think once again.

they don't deserve that sweet girl inside you,

the girl that your mother would rock to sleep,

the girl that your father would give piggyback rides to.

don't hurt that sweet little girl inside you.

don't let them hurt her.

you must protect her.

i look around at the cafeteria,

mapping out everyone there,

i could sit over there,

but i can't.

or maybe,

just maybe,

over there?

nope.

man, this is tough.