Time isn't right

I wish I wasn't born like this,
As if my life depends on the time, 
I can't wait or it'll be too late. 

I look at myself and feel the same disgust,
As all those years ago.
My mother's words still imprinted in my head, 
Knowing the love I get would be more if I wasn't like this. 

The words hit my brain, 
And suddenly I'm eight again, 
With the same feelings of worry and pain, 
But I can't say anything.
I can't be more different than I already am.