Less Rocks, Somewhat Less Crying, Still A Lot Of Fun

Note to the reader: This essay is meant to accompany the essay that I wrote called Crying on Rocks which is on YWP. 

My second year at Camp Betsey Cox was just as good as the first. I still struggled with anxiety, but it felt more manageable than last year. I did more activities, way more letter writing, and also got to meet two of my step cousins for the first time.

On the first day, I had to wake up very early so that I could get to camp on time. When I got there, one of my counselors was welcoming people to camp, she had an Australian accent and was named Vanessa. I lugged my trunk out of the car so that Dave could put it in the tractor, then I walked up to my cabin, which this year was called Haystack. When I got there, the counselor said “Hi, I’m Francie.” and I said “No, you’re my cousin.” Which was true. When I said that, she whipped around and said “You’re Sparrow?!?” and then we hugged. Later I would wish I could have said something more funny like “Yes, and you’re going to UVM, and live in Savannah, Georgia.” But right then I was just happy to meet my cousin. 

At lunch, there were announcements, and we found out that both Lorrie or Deverie would not be at camp because of family and medical emergencies. I was upset, but I already knew that Deverie wouldn’t be there so I wasn’t shocked. After lunch was rest hour, and then the first activity period of the second session. I decided that I was going to go to music and so I went to the library. When I got there, the lady running music who was named Christie asked me what my favorite music artist was. I responded that my favorite artist was a Vermont artist named Tip/Toe. Christie seemed to get excited when I told her that and then she told me that the place where she had worked for years was where Tip/Toe had started her career, so she knew her personally. I decided that I liked her and told her that I would be back. After that I went to free swim. That night was cabin night, I wasn’t hungry but did enjoy myself because I got to know Francie more.

The next day was Monday, I had only got 4 hours of sleep the last so I was exhausted and also not hungry because I was anxious. First period that day I had swim lessons which was good because it distracted me from my stomach which wasn’t feeling amazing. Second period, I went to a new activity that Abby (who I remembered from last year) was doing. When she introduced it at breakfast, she said that we would be looking for cool rocks. I associated finding rock with Betsey Cox so I went and it turned out that I was the only one who wanted to collect rocks. Abby told me that she was calling her activity DIRT which stood for doing irrationally reasonable things, I quite enjoyed it. Lunch that day was sandwiches, and I ate them even though I wasn’t hungry because I knew that I would get more sick if I didn’t. That afternoon I got invited to go to the weavery and so I stayed there for both periods. I ate salad that night because it was the only thing that seemed stomachable. Before the evening program, which was cabin intro skits, I talked to Francie because I noticed that I was freaking out when she would do small things like laugh because it reminded me that we were family. 

Tuesday morning, when I woke up I still wasn’t hungry. I went to the weavery at the warning bell so that I could finish my bag and then I went to music to practice guitar. In second period I went to swim which was fun except that I found out that I had to do more of the same things that I did last year because my sheet got replaced. At lunch, I ate salad again because I still wasn’t hungry. That afternoon I went to riding third period and then I went to archery for the first time. They were both fun, especially when I asked Francie, who was the archery counselor, how she breathed when she shot arrows and she got somewhat confused. That night Francie went on day off so I didn’t have someone to talk to and I started freaking out.  What didn’t help was that there was a huge thunderstorm so we had to stay in the lodge and it was really loud. I ended up sitting in an enclosed area behind the kitchen with a woman named Nina who was really cool and encouraged me to talk to Francie about how weird I was feeling about the strange dynamic we had going on. 

Wednesday was the first day I actually felt hungry so I ate hash browns and sausage for breakfast. First period that day I went to archery, even though Francie was on day off and it was too hot I had a good time. After that I had to go to garden because it was my job on the job wheel and we made tiny succulent gardens. On Wednesday afternoon I went on a mystery hike with the activity called BIRCH and we ended up going to a zen garden and a swim place called blue hole. It was really fun, and I realized on the hike that it had been one year since I met Roz, who is Francie’s sister. That night was the first social, at socials you stand around in an awkward circle and introduce yourself.  Socials are always awkward and what made this one worse (or better, I don’t know) was that Jesse Wasily who is Francie's half brother was there and I wasn’t expecting to meet more family that night. Another really fun thing was that in my brother cabin was a kid who I had met last year and we had a really nice conversation. After the social I was having a hard time getting to sleep and I was crying a lot so I decided to go out to Bleak who is there if you need something at night. Bleak turned out to be super helpful and told me that I should ask Francie to talk about us being family.

On Thursday, I wasn’t hungry again even though breakfast was french toast. First period was swimming, and then I went to drama. I didn’t quite know what to expect, but I did know that they were doing drama games and I wanted to expand my comfort zone. We played three drama games. The first two were very similar and called waa and bunny bunny, you had to pay attention to who had the bunny bunny or the waa so that you didn’t get out. The third was called park bench and I wasn’t sure I would be good at it because it was an improv game and I get very nervous when I have to improvise in front of people, but it turned out that I could get people to leave almost immediately if I talked extremely fast about things that were completely irrelevant. For lunch on Thursday there were dino nuggets and french fries, which surprisingly I found very appetizing. After lunch, I signed up to make charcuterie boards with a woman named Hillary Lambert. During that I got to connect both with Hillary who knew lots about nutrition which I focus on and I also got to connect with a girl in my cabin whose name was Ivy, because she signed up for the same period as me. For fourth period there was a co-ed free swim with Sangamon that I attended with Ivy and our friend Jazz who was also in Haystack. That night I was extremely tired after the evening program which was world cup soccer and I told Francie that I had to go to bed immediately, or I would start crying. When I climbed onto my bunk, I heard a loud ripping noise and the canvas broke beneath me. After that, I had to wait for fifteen minutes so they could figure out where I was going to sleep that night, and I ended up having to sleep on the floor because all the bunks were taken.

On Friday there were biscuits for breakfast and they were amazing even though they were Bisquick. First period I went to weavery to make a strap for my bag that I had made earlier in the week, and then I went to arts and crafts to make beaded lizards, which was rather boring because I had done it when I was very young. After that, I went to my swim lesson and got informed by one of the pond counselors that she thought I could pass by the time I was leaving in one week. For lunch, we had tacos. At B.C. we have a rule that is: If you kill it, you fill it. Someone had used most of the lettuce that we were supposed to put on our tacos, when it got handed to Francie and the person claimed that three pieces of lettuce were a serving Francie said “Over my dead body” and then went and filled it for the table. After rest hour I wasn’t feeling amazing and I was still exhausted so I went to drama and we wrote letters and drew. After that I went to archery, but Francie was feeling bad and looked really sick, so me and the other people went to drama for the rest of fourth period. I was feeling upset during free time before dinner so I went and sat on top of the rock outside the office. One of the swim people who was also a senior staff came over and we had a really nice conversation. When I told her that I was feeling weird about the fact that Francie was my cousin, she turned her head and said “So you’re the long-lost cousin?” which I thought was hilarious. For dinner that night we had pizza which was so good.

The next morning was Saturday, which meant that there was late wake up and we got donuts and bagels for breakfast. That morning after breakfast there was a staff softball game which was fun to see, especially because Jesse and Francie were both playing in it. I tried to say hi to Jesse after the game, but I don’t think he recognized me because I was wearing different glasses. For lunch on Saturday the Cambodian chefs made curry which was one of the best meals that I had at camp. After that, it was theme day, which this year was themed under the sea. There were pirates and mermaids, and you had to run away from the muggies who were dressed up as sharks. I did that for a while, and then I started getting a headache, so I went to the yurt where I got to lay on the floor and listen to Maeve who is a first year counselor like Francie make jokes and act like a camper, which was super fun. For dinner that night there was chicken and it was good but sort of dry so I didn’t eat much. After dinner, we had to walk all over camp to try to find the treasure that we had been informed at dinner was originally for both the mermaids and pirates to share. We ended up at the pond and there was a fight with pool noodles and it ended in one of the mermaids and one of the pirates standing on the floating dock and saying “My treasure?” “Your treasure?” “Our treasure?” It was kind of dumb but also super silly and fun.  The best part of the day was when Francie, who was one of the pirates got pushed into the pond with all of her clothes on. 

For breakfast on Sunday, there was fruit and biscuits. We had to sign up for Sunday seminars and so I signed up for a fishing one. I had a lot of fun and caught 4 fish. After that there was free time, and while I was sitting outside the cabin Francie came by looking like she had got hit by a truck and told me that she had a fever and had to go to Bread loaf which is the sick cabin. I have mentioned before that I hadn’t been feeling great, and after lunch I went to the nurse to have my temperature checked. I was at 100° Fahrenheit, so she told me to come back after rest period to check in. Sunday was our shower day which meant that I could take a shower during rest time but still wasn’t feeling good, so I talked to my counselor Vanessa who I don’t think believed me because she told me that Francie had been feeling sick for weeks. I went back to the nurse and she said that she believed me, but that I should stay out of Bread loaf for as long as possible. The rest of that day was kind of blurry but I do remember going to a seminar about starting a business, and also not being allowed to go to cabin night free swim. 

Monday morning I was feeling better so I went to activities. They were normal except that it was CIT muggie switch day, so there were Sangamon boys teaching some of our activities. I went to swim first, which Vanessa said I probably shouldn't do but I could tell that I just needed to keep my schedule the same as normal. After swim, I went to riding which was fun because it was the second and last time I got to go. At lunch there were no forks and I think it was because of the CIT's. For third period, I decided to go to the wood shop to make twirlys that you hang outside and they spin in the wind. After that, I went to pottery to glaze tiles that you can use as potholders. When fourth period was over, I went to arts and crafts so that I could make paper cranes that I was planning to give to Francie when she got better. I was hoping that she might not be sick by Tuesday but I was pleasantly surprised when she came up from Bread loaf that very afternoon. For dinner that night I ate salad because the ravioli which was what was supposed to be for dinner was very unappetizing. After dinner was evening program, which tonight was capture the flag, and I noticed myself feeling unbelievably happy that Francie was back not just because she was my cousin but because our cabin had a balance that with her gone was thrown off. 

Tuesday we had oatmeal for breakfast which I was hungry enough to eat. First I went to wood shop to finish my twirly and then I went to arts and crafts to close out the period. For second period I went to swim lessons, and finished my swim level which meant that I was a perch 2 instead of perch 1. For lunch, we had grilled cheese, which I choked down and then I ate a salad. At lunch, we had to sign up for trip day which is Wednesday, and I decided to go to a riding intensive. That afternoon I went to pottery to finish glazing my trivets, and then I went to drama to audition for the talent show where I would be singing Get Out The Map by the Indigo Girls. At dinner there were egg rolls and fried rice, I got there before Francie but when she did get to the table she slammed her hands on the table and said “So here's the game plan: we dump all the egg rolls on my plate and then I run up to the counter and get more before they run out.” I thought she was joking, but she was serious, and so that's what we did. At dinner, one of the senior counselors came over to me and Jazz who had also signed up for the riding intensive and told us that because we weren't advanced beginners we couldn’t be in the intensive, so instead we both ended up having to sign up for an art intensive instead. 

On Wednesday morning there was french toast, and we had to make bag lunches. After that, me and Jazz went to the arts and crafts building, to wait for the activities to start. When Shazy and Gretchen, who were teaching the intensive, got to the arts and crafts building, we went out and collected flowers that they said we could press in the microwave. I was skeptical, but when I went along with their ideas with only mild grumbling when the book that we put in the microwave started to heat up and fall apart. Most of the morning was boring but I got to hang out with my friends which was fun. During rest hour, none of the cabins were there so we got to shower, which brought my spirits up from the somewhat childish activities of the morning. In the afternoon Shazy was doing a creative writing activity which I wasn’t expecting to enjoy because I can’t make up stories very well but ended up loving it. The writing prompt was to write from the perspective of a tree about camp. I wrote from a tree’s point of view about my first year at camp and meeting Roz who is Francie’s sister in the birch grove at the first social. That evening there was the second social and it was at Sangamon. They decided that It would be a good idea to have a western themed social where they play mostly country music, which was boring and stupid. No mater what most of the Sangamon boys seem to think: you can’t mosh to country music. Because of the music, I didn’t dance and instead sat on the upper tennis court until the kid who I remembered from last year came over. We had a lovely conversation about our favorite kinds of music because neither of us liked country, and also about living in Vermont and loving B.C. and Sangamon.

On Thursday first period I went to music which was super fun even though Christie couldn't find my sheet that I had been working on so I had to start again. Second period I went to my last swim lesson at the pond, which was fun except that I had just passed a level and so nothing I did that day made a difference for next year. For lunch, there were dino nuggets and fries again. Hillary was coming back to camp that afternoon to do a class on freezer jam, which I decided to sign up for because nothing else sounded interesting. After jam making I had to re audition for the talent show in the lodge, and then I went to another co-ed free swim which wasn’t as fun as the first. For dinner, we had pizza that was some of the best I’ve ever had, and then we had to go to evening program. For evening program there were paper bag skits which were boring, but there were also fun things like having campers line the staff up by age and singing camp songs. 

Friday was the last day of camp, and so the kitchen made us a special breakfast of pancakes. First period I went to the ropes course with some of the girls in my cabin and then I went to drama to practice for the talent show because my voice sounded different to me in the lodge and I had to get used to it. For lunch there was mac and cheese which was amazing and felt very comforting. After lunch, it was time for unpack-repack. It took most of the afternoon and I kept having to take breaks outside the cabin because everyone was having emotions and I was absorbing a lot of them which wasn’t fun. After cleaning the cabin I went to free swim and talked to Carla who was a lifeguard and I remembered from last year. The next thing was the awards ceremony and I got an origami fish made out of my old swim sheet. Dinner on the last night was the banquet dinner, so there was fancy chicken, but I mostly ate salad because it was the last time I could eat at the salad bar this year. The first part of evening program was the talent show and I nailed singing Get Out The Map. After that we were supposed to watch the slide show but it got too late and so we went straight to the bonfire. Most people cry at the end and I was prepared to, but some of my cabin mates were being inconsiderate by making jokes and laughing a lot. The two sweetest parts of that night were first when I noticed Francie starting to cry so I reached over and she smiled super big at me, and second was when I gave Shazy a hug when she was weeping at the end of the fire. 

The next day, we all woke up really early and finished cleaning the cabin. Then we all ate breakfast, got our stuff and left. Camp was one of my favorite things that I’ve done this year, and I’m planning on going back next year.