Know herself

She used to never be scared
She used to be quiet and meek and obedient
She used to speak and be heard because
she was only repeating what she had been told
She used to wreathe her hair in flowers, sweet innocence for a crown
She used to laugh only because she found every joke funny
She used to be real only because she had nothing to fake
She used to take everything with a pinch of sugar only because no one offered her any salt
She used to be happy only because she didn't have to pretend to be okay
She used to not argue and just pout
She used to dance everywhere, music or not, because she felt the freedom of her body
The world was her stage and she was the actor
She hadn't been broken yet
She used to be known by everyone
only because she didn't know herself
She used to be perfect

She grew scared when she was hurt over and over again
Being quiet and always obeying didn't get her anywhere
So she started yelling and standing her ground, chin raised, eyes flashing
She started speaking her own words and everyone listened but no one heard her
She wraps her head in a crown of words and fire and defiance
She laughs at what she finds funny
and fakes a smile through the hurt
She went fake for a little bit
because it was the only thing that would keep her family alive
She refuses sugar now, turning the salt and words over and over in her mouth before responding
She's stopped being so happy because she doesn't want to pretend to be okay anymore
She fights and and cuts with her words and she is the one who comes out bleeding
She no longer dances because her body is dangerous and many moments she wants out of her skin
She is still an actor in this world
but it's much harder to find a place on the stage
She's been broken and broken and broken
and finding her pieces is hard and she's still so full of cracks and gaps
She is no longer known by many people at all
only because she finally knows herself
She is no longer perfect
so that she can make mistakes

She used to be a girl
Until she was forced to become a woman