FaceTime tonight?

three years ago.
three years I spent
your name on the tip of my tongue, traced down my throat,
washed out with bitter disbelief. 
I never paid you any attention during the first few days. 
you weren't quiet though. 
did the stars write our seating charts? 
I joked about how I was stuck with you.
I thought you to be a heartbreaker, close-minded
and way too cool for me. 
I was in sixth grade,
I was naive. 

two years ago. 
my archived infatuation with you 
caved in.
I learned to hate you.
distance makes the heart break. 

this year.
I feel embarrassed to write about you like this. 
my feelings have marinated in bullets aimed at us
and the lives we left behind. 
I spent this year 
with our seats separated
because even the teachers know how close we are. 
I would never have thought we could be friends like
this.