maelynslavik

Most people find brown an odd colour to choose.  

It's loud. 

Ugly. 

In your face. 

This brown is the colour of shifting leaves as they float to the ground come October. 

What if I were her? 

What if I was the girl you liked in 5th grade, the one with long, silky hair 

The one with a slim body

A pretty voice, beautiful eyes… 

Flame to finger 

Burn away the remembering 

smoke leaving through windows 

trace of yearning

to exploit the whispers that come from deep inside 

I know you feel it 

As a woman you’ll learn fast

You’ll learn that no amount of crying will work

No amount of visits will convince them 

I can't describe this feeling 

It's one I've never known

But I know that it feels bad

And I can feel it in my bones

It's a distinct emptiness 

But not a hole or void

Bright spots:

The kid who gave me twizzlers

an hour after we really met

just because I'm a sorta-friend of a sorta-friend.

The video on my phone

you don't know I took